hiao meow meow

there is a cat splashed in grey and orange
conventionally cute but a wee bit strange
it lies half asleep every morning
on the third floor stairway landing
and reposes in the same spot each afternoon
when the weather’s so hot it will make you swoon
oozing attitude and looking blasé
like an actor nursing a latté in a parisian café
stretched out in complete laziness
often striking dramatic poses
like a feline pornstar rockstar superstar
reclining on the hood of a retro sports car
purring or mewing ever so slightly
when you rub its fat fuzzy irresistible belly
the silly cat on the third floor stairway landing
lives a charmed life with a fairytale ending

babies and his diet

A debrief from Ah Tan after one of her compulsory natural family planning classes…

“If your husband eats a lot of vegetables and fish, his sperms are more likely to produce girls than boys. And if he is a meat lover, your chances of getting boys are higher.”
“Uh huh…”
“Yeah, so if he is vegetarian, you’ll probably just get girls all the way.”
“What happens if he is an omnivore?”
“We are all omnivores what!”
“I meant if he eats a balanced diet of vegetables, fish and meat and what not. Then what happens?”
“I dunno…”
“You get transgendered babies?”
“Maybe.”